Asrai Devin

Kiss me, and you will see how important I am.” ― Sylvia Plath

November 29, 2016
by asrai

Love Worth the Wait



Maria grew up idolizing Eric Thomlin, her older brother’s best friend. And as she grew, so did her feelings for him. When Eric hears Maria loves him, he runs. She’s too young and too innocent for the likes of him. Four years later, he’s back at home. Can Eric prove that he’s worthy of her love? Or will his fear of hurting her make him run again, this time for good?





Maria surveyed the destruction in the Thomlin kitchen. She rubbed her chest. The Thomlin name always made her ache.

She tossed her hair. This was her first big job, she would not ruin it by thinking she missed him

She didn’t miss him at all. He left her, moving to another city four years ago. He left because he was traded to a different team that night. But he never called to say goodbye, to let her know, to check on her.

She took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. Besides, she was a grown woman, an almost engaged woman, with a business to run.

She pulled out her sketches and paced the length of the kitchen. The front door opened without a knock that must be the general contractor the Thomlin’s hired to do the work.

“Hello?” his voice called.

“In the kitchen,” she replied. “What’s left of it,” she muttered to herself.

She turned and her book dropped from her hands. Eric Thomlin. Fuck. If the thought of him made her chest ache, the sight of him made her body stop working. Her jaw dropped open as she stared at him.

He hadn’t seen her, he was surveying the kitchen. “What happened here?”

His voice clicked her brain back into working mode. She dropped to her knees to gather the papers that scattered. If only her thoughts were so easily retrieved. What the hell was he doing here? His mother assured her he rarely visited.

“Your parents are redoing their kitchen.”

“How do—”

She stood and his eyes went wide. “Maria.”

She was glad to have the advantage for once as she recovered her composure from the floor. “Hello Eric. How are you?”

Author’s Notes

This book was inspired by a picture. You can read about it on this chapter preview. NSFW content at the link. Okay, that’s most of my links.

Where to Buy

Amazon US  |  Canada | UK | Apple | Barnes and Noble | Kobo | Smashwords

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November 26, 2016
by asrai

Dressing Ben: A Steamy Short

If you haven’t read Just Say Uncle, this won’t spoil anything for you, but it’s a free read.

Just Say Uncle

Just Say Uncle

Selene laid Ben’s suit out on their bed while he showered. She laid her dress beside his. Dressed in only her bra and panties, she slid in at the antique dressing table she purchased a few weeks ago. She pulled her hair back in a bun and applied her makeup for another day at the office. When she heard the shower turn off, she knelt on the floor beside the bed.

He came out drying his hair with a towel. She traced a drop of water down her chest with her eyes. She considered offering to lick him dry, but then they would be late for work.

He stopped in front of her, his hand caressed her cheek. “I like when you kneel. But I wonder if you are trying to make us late for work?”

“I thought I would help you dress.”

He searched her face. “Alright kitten.”

“Sit, please.” He moved back to the bed and sat in the space between their outfits.

Selene edged over and grabbed his underwear. He helped her slide it up his still damp legs. They put his pants on next. She fasted them in the front. Then she circled him on her knees on the bed, sliding his belt through the loops.

He didn’t lift his arm when she held out his shirt. He tried to remain as passive as possible, but he couldn’t help smiling.

She shook her head and pressed a kiss to his mouth. She slipped his hand into one sleeve and pulled it up his arm. The other side was harder.

When she stood face to chest, it gave her pause. She couldn’t help running her fingers over his skin, still golden from their tropical vacation, where they sunbathed nude when they weren’t making love.

He captured her hand and kissed her fingers. “Button my shirt, kitten.”

She was powerless to resist his commands. It was going to be a long day while she waited to be alone with him.

She pulled her hands from his chest and buttoned his shirt. She started to tuck it into his waistband, but he pushed her hands away. “I don’t trust myself with your hands so close.”

She held her breath as he tucked his shirt in and did up the buckle of his belt.

She flipped up the collar of his shirt and wrapped the tie around his neck. Biting her bottom lip, she tried to recall the order of the motions that turned the silk fabric into a tie.  It wasn’t the first time she’d tied his tie, but it was damn complicated. She huffed as she tightened it. “It’s crooked,” she said, pulling it loose again.

He leaned up to kiss her with a smile. He tied the tie and tightened it. Her stomach clenched. “Is it crooked?” He glanced down at the tie.

She shook her head. “I was trying to figure out if you are hotter naked or fully dressed.”

“I’m glad getting married didn’t make the magic wear off.”

“Never,” she promised. She pressed in and kissed him hard. “I love you forever, Benjamin.”

He ran his hands over her hips. “I love you too, Kitten.” His hands played with the lace straps on the sides of her panties.

She picked up his jacked and swung it around behind him. He tucked his arms into the jacket.

He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her into a kiss. “I didn’t know I would enjoy getting dressed so much.”

“So long as the moment we are back in this room I get to undress you.”

He kissed her forehead. “Something to look forward to.”

He released her and picked up his coffee mug from the side table. He gestured to her outfit. “And now I get to watch you dress. Which is half as much fun as watching you undress.

He winked at her. She laughed and picked up her dress.

Want to read the evening version where they undress? Let me know on Twitter.
Tweet: @asrai can’t wait to read Ben and Selene undressing.
This steamy romance novel scene was inspired by a picture. Because I can’t find copyright info on it (probably because I found it on Tumblr), I’ll link to it.

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November 19, 2016
by asrai
1 Comment

A short preview

Read Chapter One here. It’s been four years since Maria saw Eric last (see chapter one preview for that explosive meeting). Maria’s moved on. Right?

lwtw_4Maria surveyed the destruction in the Thomlin kitchen. She rubbed her chest. The Thomlin name always made her ache.

She tossed her hair. This was her first big job, she would not ruin it by thinking she missed him

She didn’t miss him at all. He left her, moving to another city four years ago. He left because he was traded to a different team that night. But he never called to say goodbye, to let her know, to check on her.

She took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. Besides, she was a grown woman, an almost engaged woman, with a business to run.

She pulled out her sketches and paced the length of the kitchen. The front door opened without a knock that must be the general contractor the Thomlin’s hired to do the work.

“Hello?” his voice called.

“In the kitchen,” she replied. “What’s left of it,” she muttered to herself.

She turned and her book dropped from her hands. Eric Thomlin. Fuck. If the thought of him made her chest ache, the sight of him made her body stop working. Her jaw dropped open as she stared at him.

He hadn’t seen her, he was surveying the kitchen. “What happened here?”

His voice clicked her brain back into working mode. She dropped to her knees to gather the papers that scattered. If only her thoughts were so easily retrieved. What the hell was he doing here? His mother assured her he rarely visited.

“Your parents are redoing their kitchen.”

“How do—”

She stood and his eyes went wide. “Maria.”

She was glad to have the advantage for once as she recovered her composure from the floor. “Hello Eric. How are you?”


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November 12, 2016
by asrai


The most important link to share from the last month is the first chapter from my new book.
What do you do when your mom embarrasses you in front of your crush? What do you do when he follows and kisses you?


What makes an erection sexy?

A tale of forced orgasms. #sexy #masturbationmonday

Strap on 101

How to focus sexual energy to make magic.

Lube infographic do you lube it up?? Halloween hitchhiker has the promise of something. Can’t wait to see where it goes @NicciHaydon (turns out this is a longer free download) ugh to both these “if men wrote the way women do” and blackmailing video sex. If you read #1 books get better books. Also look, another shaming of what women read. 

He requested tea with my beating. That was new. from @Heather_Cole1

Shame and sex shouldn’t go together but they often do. Here’s some tips on how to deal:

Slave endures harsh punishment for breaking the rules.

42 kinds of casual sex.

This is just a little snippet of what I shared on my Twitter and Facebook the last few weeks. I post a link at least 7 times a day, so i didn’t share everything. If you don’t want to miss anything, follow me on Twitter. Http://

Like free books? Get on the mailing list! Free book with sign up. Click the image!free

November 5, 2016
by asrai

First chapter preview: Love Worth the Wait


Eric broke Maria’s heart once. Can he convince her that love is worth the wait?

Maria felt like a friggin’ princess. She was at her parents’ party. She was wearing a fancy dress. She was drinking champagne.

It wasn’t her first time for any of those things. It was her first time as a grown-up. She was twenty now.

The only stumble was the presence of Eric Thomlin. She was no longer a child who followed him (and her brothers) around while she mooned over him. She did her best to ignore him, while he flitted around the room with the beautiful, and newly divorced according to her mother, Claudia Monroe, stuck to his side and flirting hard.

Claudia was tall and thin and gorgeous and charming.

Maria was none of those things. She was the short, squat, little sister of Eric’s childhood friends. Her brothers, half-brothers from her mother’s first marriage, weren’t here. But Eric was a professional hockey player now, just finished his first season in the city.

She was staring at him. Stop it! She berated herself. She looked down at her glass then glanced back up. Crap! His eyes danced as they met hers. He caught her staring. Her scalp prickled and she gave him a weak smile.

A broad smile split his gorgeous face, making him look even better. He could still make her knees go weak. He said something to Claudia who smiled at him and took her claws out of his arm. She glared at Maria, who shrunk backward.

Maria’s eyes moved back to Eric. Oh god, he was walking toward her. He was coming over to her.

She used one hand to fix her hair and keep the flutter of her body on the inside. She fixed a smile on her face.

“Maria. Aren’t you a picture, all grown up?” He took her elbow and kissed her cheek. “I don’t think I’ve seen you in about five years.”

She melted as his lips touched her skin. The heat from him blossomed through her body. She looked up into his eyes and blinked. His scent made her world spin. She took a drink and focused on the champagne bubbles dancing over her tongue.

“Has it been that long?” she murmured. She’d seen him around the club in the summers when he wasn’t off playing hockey, first amateurs and now professional level. Clearly he hadn’t noticed her any of those times in the last five years. She should be used to that, but it still stung. She dipped her head to hide her wince.

“How is school?”

“Good,” she nodded into her glass, glad to have a neutral topic. “I’m majoring in architecture.”

“Putting your drawing skills into a practical application. Very Rowe of you.”

“I was never the type to rebel. That was David’s job.” She tossed her head, her confidence returning.

“He’s settled down now, isn’t it?”

“He’s a dentist. Hardly following in the Rowe tradition.”

Eric raised an eyebrow. “He was the only one of us who dared follow his dreams. Funny that becoming a dentist made him the black sheep.”

Wasn’t that sad of the family? He should be lauded for what he’d done. Dental school wasn’t an easy feat. But it was too hands on, too messy. Her family was lawyers, bankers, and money managers.

“Then again, I guess I’m a disappointment as well.”

“What have you done to disappoint anyone?” She put her hand on his arm. They both looked at it, but she wasn’t moving away now. She swallowed the lump in her throat.

He was perfect. She was so close she could count the long lashes that surrounded his dark eyes. She could lift her hand and touch the waves of his hair. Her breath caught as she realized he leaned closer to her, to speak in confidence.

“Besides being a late draft into hockey? Not finishing college?”

She looked into her drink watch the bubbles rise to the surface. How should she respond to that statement?

“Do you want to dance?”

Her eyes shot back up to him and she was an innocent girl under the gaze of nefarious seducer. Beautiful. Wanted. Sexy.

The need to breathe broke her rapture. She looked around the crowd. “Uh—” Her eyes landed on the dance floor, the four-piece band played a slow waltz, but no one danced at these events. Her fingers fluttered on her glass.

“You’re right no one dances at these things. I thought maybe.”

Her heart crashed and she reached out to him. “I’d love to. I was looking for a place to put my drink.”

He graced her with a warm, grateful smile. He took her glass and set it aside with his. Then he took her arm and pulled her toward the dance floor. He put his arms around her, text book dance class from their youth, and led her perfectly in time with the music. Her blood turned to champagne, ecstatic bubbles flowed in her veins.

She didn’t know if the other party attendees got quiet or if she tuned them out. The only thing in the world right now was Eric. His dark eyes peered down at her, so dark she couldn’t see inside him. “You look tense, am I doing this wrong?”

“I don’t think you could do anything wrong.” She sounded breathless. She was breathless. “I’m afraid I’ll step on your toes.” She couldn’t contain her excitement as she looked up at him.

His arms stiffened. “I do a lot wrong,” he said. “Ask my father, I don’t do anything right.”

“I remember my brothers saying he was tough on you growing up. I’m sorry.”

“It’s not on you, sweetheart.”

If he hadn’t been holding her up and leading her through the dance, the endearment might have made her melt into the floor.

“So are you dating Claudia Monroe then?”

“God no, what gave you that impression?”

“She is stuck to your side.”

“Don’t remind me. I couldn’t think of a polite way to extract her until I saw you standing in the corner all alone. Looking beautiful.”

She looked down. “Thank you. I don’t know if anyone could say that.”

He used one hand to tip her chin up a little, his callouses rasped her skin, leaving a tingle. “I just did. You were the prettiest of the little sister’s to follow us around.”

Her heart fell. She was still just a little sister who followed him around.

“And you’ve turned into a gorgeous woman. You must have to beat the boys off with a stick at school.”

She shook her head with a giggle. “Hardly.”

The song ended and she pulled away. He tightened his grip, dragging her back. “Are you done?”

“The song is over, I thought you’d want to get rid of me.”

“One more before we go back to the vultures.” He pulled her closer and led her into the steps of the new beat.

She’d dance with him forever if he wanted. But the second song ended and he led her off the floor. Her mother was waiting for her, with a smile. The smile was for him not for her, Maria was certain. “That was sweet of you to dance with our Maria, Eric,” her mother said.

“She was sweet to dance with me. We made a spectacle I imagine, no one dances at these events,” Eric said. His arm was still around her. She should move away, but no outside force could make her.
“She’s an old friend, people understand. They respect you for it. I see Claudia Monroe has her sights set on you.”

“Good thing for me I’m not easily caught.”

“You always were the ladies man. I know Maria had a crush on you when she was a kid.”


“She used to doodle your name and she drew you all the time.”

“Did she?” Eric said.

Maria’s face heated. “Mother, please, don’t,” she begged.

“She even drew a picture of you and her getting married.”

Tears sprang to her eyes. “Excuse me,” she said, pulling away.

“Maria, wait,” Eric said.

But under threat of tears she walked as fast as her heels would carry her from the room. She bypassed the bathroom, and went straight to her bedroom, closing the door softly behind her. Even in rage she couldn’t resist her mother’s commands.

She kicked off her shoes and throw herself face down on her bed, letting her pillow soak her tears. She imagined Eric downstairs laughing with her mother about her silly childhood crush. It wasn’t a crush. It was love. She loved him. She always loved him.

There was a knock on her door. She ignored it. She pretended she wasn’t in here. “Maria, it’s Eric. Can I come in?”

She sat up on the edge of the bed. “So you can laugh at me?” Her voice was a pitiful warble. Or worse, he came with pity for her. She knew what came with pity. He’d tell her she was sweet but she was like his little sister.

The door opened and he stepped into the room. He filled the room. Her heart clenched in her chest as she looked up at him. Tears pricked her eyes. She loved him so much. She wanted to tell him, but the words stuck in her stomach.

“I wasn’t laughing at you, sweetheart. I knew you had a crush on me as a kid.”

“That’s all it was, a silly crush. We’ve all grown past that know.” She dropped her eyes away, shame filling her for the lie. She felt the tears escape down her cheeks.

“The way you looked at me. It felt like maybe you hadn’t. But I’m an old man. I should go.”

“You’re not an old man. You’re only seven years older than me, you aren’t even thirty.”

He pulled her chair from behind her desk and sat across from her. “How old are you, Maria?”

Her name from his lips felt like a caress down her back. She shivered, wishing he’d touch her again.

She tossed her head. “Twenty.”

“I recall seeing you as a teenager, knowing you would be beautiful. And here you are.” He cupped her cheek, his thumb brushing the tears she couldn’t contain. “You’re crying over me.”

“I don’t want you to see me as David and Charlie’s little sister. After that story, I couldn’t bear to see you laughing at me.”

His eyes darted over her face. Then he leaned in, his mouth brushed over hers. “I’m not laughing at you, sweetheart.” Another brush of his lips.

She forgot to breathe or think. Her heart thumped in her chest as she tipped her chin so her lips were against his. He caught her lower lip between his, then the upper, then his tongue. Her hands fluttered between them. Kissing! They were kissing.

He caught her hands and soothed them into quiet. He put his hand on her knee so he could get closer.

“I shouldn’t do this,” he whispered against her mouth.

“Don’t stop,” she begged. Her head spun, the world tilted on its side, her mother was downstairs angry at her for the scene. She didn’t care about any of it as long as he didn’t stop touching her.

His tongue pressed her lips open wider, invading her. She tried to match his smooth moves, but her lack of experience compared to his made her clumsy and inept. She held her breath, waiting for him to pull away. His hand cupped the back of her head and pulled her closer. She slid until she balanced on the edge of the bed. Her knees bumped into his and moved so one was between hers and one to the right. He used the inside leg against her bare thigh to urge her legs apart.

She grabbed his shoulders to anchor herself from falling. His hand that rested on her knee slid up her thigh, inside her skirt. He brushed over the lace waistband of her panties. Then his fingers went down the satin crotch that covered her most intimate parts.

She grabbed a fistful of her jacket and held on tight. She might fly off the bed or the planet.

He teased her through the thin fabric. She pulled away from his lips and buried her face in his shoulder. Her arms and legs trembled.

“Easy, sweetheart.” One hand rubbed her back in a comforting gesture, his other traced her slit in an arousing one.

He pushed the satin aside exposing her to his touch and her legs clamped around his knee. Her panties were soaking from arousal and if he touched her skin, she might break into a million pieces from the pleasure. He pulled back a little. “I shouldn’t… you’ve never?”

Oh god, he thought she was innocent. She eased her legs apart. “I’ve been touched there before Eric. But not by you.” She didn’t dare lift her head, see his amusement. Or pity.

He leaned back in the chair, his hand moved from her back to grab her chin. He forced her to look at him. “Do you want me to now, angel?”

“You’re all I’ve ever wanted.” Her heart raced and she dove for him, crashing her lips against his. She couldn’t bear it if he rejected her now. She kissed him, not caring if it was clumsy.

His hand moved between her thighs were they had stilled on her skin. His finger tickled through her pubic hair. He slid his finger between her soft lips and swirled in the moisture. She spread her legs further, her mouth falling open as she gasped, breaking the kiss. Her arms went limp and dropped to his lap, she rested her forehead on his shoulder.

His fingertip brushed over her clit and she whimpered. “Are you okay?” he asked.

She couldn’t catch her breath to answer, so he pulled back forcing her to lift her head and look at him. His long lashes flicked closed and open and she felt her heart fall.

She managed a nod to let him know she was okay, better than okay. He brushed his lips over hers, sweet in contrast to the erotic things his fingers did under her skirt.

His finger slid inside of her, then a second, his thumb circled her clit. He moved fast, driven by something she couldn’t see and she couldn’t protest. Lust swirled inside her, growing, spurred on by loving him.

Her thighs trembled again, but it wasn’t nerves. She grabbed him again, holding herself as she convulsed under his touches. He held her, his breath on her cheek while he she came undone under his hand.

She pulled herself closer, not able to look at him. She would cry. “I love you,” she whispered.

He fixed her panties back into place and withdrew. She licked her lips. What now? He kissed her forehead and lips once more, his thumb brushing her cheek.

He let go of her and she fell back on the bed, her head spinning, filled with him. More, she wanted more.

The door closing was soft, but it might as well been a thunder crack in her heart. She hadn’t even heard him get up or walk across the room. Maria came back to her senses with a jolt. She checked her face in the mirror. she grabbed a tissue and wiped the smeared lipstick and mascara away. Then she flew down the stairs in her stocking feet. She had to talk to him.

She stood in the room and spun in a circle. Her mother came to her. “You made a scene.”

“Where’s Eric?” Maria grabbed her mother’s shoulders.

“He said he had to leave. He left a minute ago.”

Maria let go of her mother and ran for the front door. Her heart fell with each step she took. She opened the door and saw him getting in a car.

“Eric,” she called, starting down the steps. Her heart skipped a beat. Would he ignore her?

He stopped and turned. Her mouth went dry. A deep frown and wrinkled forehead marred his face. He looked as devastated as she felt. She reached her arms out to him, needing his reassurance she was okay.

“I have to go Maria. I shouldn’t have—”

The cement was cool under her feet as she ran to him. She didn’t care who saw. “But… I don’t understand.”

“Maria.” His hand engulfed hers. He was warm and steady. His eyes searched her face, the darkness hiding his feelings. “I can’t ruin your life. You have so much to explore. I’m sorry, I have nothing to give you but pain. I love you too much.”

The damn tears were back, pushing the corners of her eyes for release. “I don’t understand.”

“I don’t either. Take care, Maria.” He brushed his lips over hers, swallowing her pain. He let her go and waved for an attendant. “Can you make sure she gets back inside?”

The attendant ushered her inside and Eric didn’t drive away until she was inside. How could he say he loved her and goodbye in the same sentence?

Maria thanked the attendant and went back to the party room. She told her mother she had a headache she was going to bed.

She floated back to her room. Her fingers brushed the chair Eric sat on before she pushed it back under the computer desk and put her pajamas on.

She laid on her bed and let her heart turn to rock. Fuck if she was ever letting herself feel for anyone again.


Love Worth the Wait is on sale now. 99 cents for a limited time.

October 28, 2016
by asrai

Sex magic

sex_magicHalloween. Halloween falls on Samhain, which in pagan traditions is when the veil between our world and the afterlife is thinnest. In Celtic tradition it’s the New Year. Some traditions and cultures celebrate the holiday as Day of the Dead.

I might not be the best person to talk about this topic. I’m not much of a practicing pagan these days. I’m an odd mix, because I like spirituality but I’m also rather skeptical. I think of it more as hedging my bets. Maybe there is nothing more than life as we know it, and science, but what if there is something more, what if there is an underlying energy that connects the world together that we can affect. If there’s nothing, then at least I am a little happier for using magic and law of attraction.

Magic, for all the myths, isn’t much different than the law of attraction. except it has a ritualized component, or can have one. Magic is about setting your attraction, raising energy and sending it into the world for that intention. Affirmations are a form of magic as well.

Sex magic is using sex to raise energy. You can raise energy by dancing, singing, meditating.

Along with using sex just for magical purposes, some traditions use it as a great rite to honor the God and Goddess. Fertility rites they were called historically. My most memorable literary example is Mists of Avalon, where  Morgaine (Morgan La Fay) was tricked into sleeping with Arthur, her half-brother, during a fertility rite where the King symbolically marries a priestess and thus the land he’s sworn to protect.

Pagan mythology is full of Goddess and Gods of love and sexuality. The Greeks were very licentious. Zeus in particular was known to bang anything that moved. And he must have had sex magic, because he knocked them all up.

The Greek myth I’ve always been drawn to and want to write is Persephone. I’d love to write a version where Hades seduces her and she has to stay because she has sex with him three times. So she has to satisfy her marriage vows. She’s a bit of a sad, passive characters, because no one fucking asks her what she wants. I’ll have to figure that out when I rewrite the story. She deserves a happier ending, and Demeter needs to get a dog and get over her daughter growing up and moving on.

But I did find that Selena Kitt has written a few myths, including Peresphone’s. So I’m very excited to read that. As soon as I finish what I’m currently reading. It’s still on my planned novel list for now. 😉

Most of the reading I did on the subject, because I’ve been out of practice for years, encourage caution when using sex magic. Magic is raising energy for a purpose, so you need to be able to focus on the purpose while doing something that could be distracting.

Can you do sex magic alone?

Yep. You can cast your circle, light your candles, start your ritual, then lay back and masturbate to raise energy while keeping your purpose in mind. And then when you reach the peak, allow it to flood your mind.

You can also involve a partner. A lot of places recommended that simultaneous orgasm for the most powerful energy.

It was difficult to find information. It seems that magic and Wicca blogs are on the decline. Most sources are more than five years old.

Ever considered using magic in your life? How about some sex magic for raising energy?

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October 22, 2016
by asrai

Rivalmance vs Friendmance

friend_rival_twiThere are two types of romances: Freindmance and rivalmance. The terms were coined from the Bioware game Dragon Age II, which is you know is my favorite game series ever. In the series there is conflict between mages and those charged with keeping them under lock and key, Templars. Like most jailers there are abuses of power. At the end of this game the conflict really polarizes, and the main character, YOU, make a number of choices that affect the outcome. And your companions either love or hate your choices. And you can romance almost all your companions, and even if they hate your choices, you can still romance them.

Friendmances are easy. The couple are friends, they like each other, they each other’s choices, they like each other’s personalities.

What keeps freindmances apart is never lack of attraction or lack of friendship. Outside circumstances keep them apart. Inside conflict keep them apart, usually a past hurt. Most romances novels are friendmances, even BDSM ones. In my books Second Chance Romance, Love in the Wild, Don’t Count Out Love, to name a few. And my fave Where She Belongs where the romance is borne out of their friendship.

Freindmances are easy to find in books, but harder to find in movies and TV. Ever After: A Cinderella story is a great example. 10 Things I Hate about You, Titanic, Pretty Woman, 50 Shades of Grey, Twilight. Serendipity. I could keep going.

On the other side, rivalmances are full of conflict between the couple. As an outsider, you wonder if they even like each other. They bicker, they fight. If it’s a romance novel, they have a lot of REALLY HOT SEX. Burning, lava, hot sex that melts my panties and leaves me in a puddle. Ahem. Where was I?

But they sort of treat each other like crap. And often we as observers are left wondering “why would you keep fucking someone who treats you like this? Even if it’s the best sex EVER.”

My favorite rivalmance is Reasonable Doubt by Whitney G. Oh god, I don’t even care that Andrew is an ass ALL THE TIME. He treats Aubrey like shit. I’d still climb him like a tree and bang him like a screen door in a hurricane. He has his reasons for being a jerk, but even after that’s resolved, he’s still … ugh, mean sometimes.

Ryan and Alex in Quantico are in a rivalmance. They spend the entire first season not trusting each other. They are both spies so they kind of have to act this way. But their entire realtionship is built on lies, have truths, and hidden secrets. And, yet, they can’t keep away from each other. Lucifer and Chloe are mostly rivals, that’s more on Chloe’s end because she’s a little skeptical of his claim of being The Devil. The more I look at TV and movies, the more examples I can find. The Proposal with Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds.

Being conflict averse I tend to write friendmances. Scott and Amy, Libby and Adam had some rival aspects, but I don’t think they fit. I can’t imagine writing a hero who is a jerk and imagine the heroine would fall in love.

But I’d still ride Andrew Hamilton like a bull!

Do you have a favorite friendmance or rivalmance I didn’t mention? Which is your favorite to read/watch/be in? Have you ever been in a rivalmance?

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October 15, 2016
by asrai

On Hands and Knees

“You little slut.” Slave didn’t have to brace herself for the slap across the face. The blow knocked her back from where she was kneeling. It didn’t faze her much; her mind was racing to figure out what he’d caught her at today. Meanwhile, she brought herself to kneeling again.

Yesterday she’d failed to be ready for him when he got home. The day before she didn’t write her journal page for him. She could list her transgressions for the past three weeks. But, not today’s.

“Yes, Sir. I am a slut.” His gaze leveled on hers. “Your slut.” She hastened to add, “I am your slut sir.” She dropped her gaze.

It was too late. He slapped her again. This time it still stung, but left her sitting still.

“Apparently, you don’t remember the rules.” He snapped his fingers as he walked past her. “You’ll crawl for the rest of the night now. Unless reaching for something I’ve requested. Get me a drink and I’ll rest my feet while you can recite the rules. Again.”

Fuck, fuck, fuck, she muttered inwardly, as she crawled behind him. He went to the living room while she went to the kitchen. She stood up and got the whiskey from the cupboard. She poured two fingers of the amber liquid into a glass. She tucked the bottle back in the cupboard and dropped to her knees. She clamped the glass in her teeth. Carrying things didn’t exempt her from crawling. She’d learned that the hard way a month ago.

She handed him the drink still on her knees. “I need somewhere to rest my feet.” That somewhere was her back. She crawled in front of his chair. He put his feet up on her flattened back. “Now you may tell me the rules. And we’ll see which ones you broke today.”

She spoke slow and loud, in a voice she still wasn’t used to using. “One, honesty at all times. Two, I will follow your command first, then I am Lila’s to command.” She stopped and took a breath, looking up at him. “Three, I will answer questions with Sir or Mistress. Four, I will maintain eye contact at all times possible.”

He was staring at her with no expression. She adjusted her legs a little and licked her lips. His eyebrows raised at her pause.

“I have four house rules. One, to do my daily chores first thing in the morning. Two, to write a page of my thoughts every day. Three, I am to be available for pleasure at any moment. Four, I am to meet you at the door kneeling every day. And I have three pleasure rules. One, don’t soil my panties. Two, I may come only with permission. And three, I say thank you after.”

She sighed and closed her eyes. Well, at least she’d realized what she’d done. “I’m sorry I broke the rules today, Sir.” Her panties were still wet from her encounter with Mistress Lila only 30 minutes earlier.

“I know you are pet. But to make sure I have to exact my punishment.” Of course he would enjoy it.

She wanted to protest. Mistress Lila had been so hot in bed today, moaning and squirming under Slave’s fingers. It wasn’t her fault she soaked through her panties.

She sighed. There were ways she could have kept her panties clean.

He took his feet off her back and put a hand under her chin, pulling her head to look at him. “You’re thinking it’s not your fault. You want to protest that it’s not fair.”

Rules one, honesty. She nodded. “Yes Sir.”

“We agreed on the rules, Slave. And you’ve demonstrated your knowledge of the rules. Where does that leave us?” He leaned back in his chair.

“I was wrong. And I deserve my punishment.” She was resigned to it now.

“Alright. In addition to crawling for the rest of the evening. I think twenty over my knee should suffice.”

“Yes sir.”

Lila spoke from the doorway. “And I?”

“Twenty from me. And ten from you my dear.” Lila crossed the room and knelt in front of the chair, near Slave’s feet. “Sit by me.” Mistress Lila stood and eased herself on the arm of his chair. She put an arm around him and kissed his cheek. “How was she? You may kneel slut.”

Slave came to her knees before them. She looked at the clock behind her. She hadn’t started supper.

“She was excellent, Master. Very thorough with her tongue. Very concentrated with her fingers.”

“And did you let her come?”

“No Sir.”

“Excellent. So she’s frustrated, already. Pity you are satisfied. We will give the punishment after supper. Slave, you may crawl to the kitchen and make supper now. Dishes will be done after your punishment.”

Slave nodded and crawled to the kitchen.

Forty minutes later she served Master at the table first. Then Mistress Lila. And finally, with a nod, Master gave her permission to eat. He added a provision, “Part of the punishment. On your knees on the floor.”

Slave merely nodded. “Thank you Sir.” She moved to the floor. It wasn’t the first time, and wouldn’t likely be the last. The first few times she’d felt degraded. And then it turned to shame that she broke the rules yet again. Mistress Lila reassured her at some point that Lila herself had eaten many meals on her knees while she was a new Slave.

After supper, Master reminded Slave to leave the dishes. She started to clear the table out of habit. She followed him on hands and knees to the living room.

He sat in his chair. “Take off your skirt and panties. You may stand.” She brought herself to standing, feeling relief in her knees. She removed her clothing and then he took her over his knee.

She squirmed on his lap. Earning her a preliminary slap that barely stung. “Be still while I do this, Slave. Now, count for me.”

The first three were light. He knew she could easily take more. He was teasing, testing. She only counted and made no other reaction. Lila was sitting on the sofa watching, intently. She so enjoyed these moments. Intimate as they were.

After six her ass stung. Slave imagined it was red. It would only be a problem for the rest of the evening, and she wasn’t likely to be allowed the chance to sit anyway tonight. Seven, eight, nine, ten. She was whimpering now after the blow, then gaining her composure to call out the number. Focus the mind, she thought, relaxing her body.

She braced herself for eleven. But he stopped. His hand slid between her legs. “Is this turning you on?” he asked, as he rubbed her bare pussy.

Her legs spread for him on their own. “Yes Sir.” He rubbed her softly until she relaxed. Without warning he withdrew his hand and smacked her again. “Eleven,” she said, her voice little more than a moan.


By the time he got to twenty she was crying out the numbers. Her composure long gone. He rubbed the reddened, swollen skin with one hand. Then he let it slip between her legs again, feeling how wet she was. “Do you like your punishment, slut?”

“No Sir. I mean yes. I don’t know, Sir.”

“Seems it does,” he said, thrusting two fingers into her open pussy. Without even thinking Slave’s legs opened for him.

“Turns me on,” Lila said, with a small smile.

Slave moaned and dropped her head. Half-hoping that he would take her to bed, instead of giving her to Lila. But, he withdrew again and put her to the floor. “Go see your Mistress. Let her finish and then you can do up the dishes before play.”

Slave crawled across the floor and then onto Lila’s lap. Lila’s skirt was soft on her skin, and Slave wrapped her fingers around the material, nuzzling her cheek against it.

Lila ran her hand over Slave’s red, heated ass. Lila rarely gave punishment. She had been with Master for years, but she suppressed her Dominant side for the entire time. In fact, it nearly ruined their marriage until she met Slave and found a way she could satisfy both sides of her personality.

“Slave will count,” Master said from across the room.

Lila was careful to conserve her strength during the early blows. Slave’s skin was already sore, but she needed to get it all in or else she’d end up over Master’s lap again.

Slave was wild in her lap by the end of the punishment. She lay limp over Lila, panting. Master came then and took Slave off Lila’s lap. Her caressed his wife’s cheek. “Good girl. Slave you may do your chores now and then join us in bed. Lila you may not come until Slave joins us.” With that he turned and left the room, leaving both women staring after him for a moment, before they launched into action…

October 1, 2016
by asrai

Good Sisters Share Epilogue

Good Sisters Share Epilogue

Good Sisters Share Epilogue

I was told that Good Sisters Share may have ended a little prematurely. So here is the epilogue. If you don’t want to be spoiled click the link right up there, buy the book, read it, review it, then come back.






Ava set the popcorn on the coffee table. Justin was alone in the living room. “Cassie’s still not back?” Cassie was settling Brody to sleep before they watched a movie together.

He shook his head. “She said we could start without her.”

Ava moved in front of him. “Or we could pass the time another way.” She put her knees on either side of him, straddling him. She caught his lips before he could protest. Despite Cassie knowing for weeks about them, giving them permission, he still struggled with touching Ava when his wife was awake.

He broke the kiss. “Ava, she’ll be down any minute.”

“Yeah so? She knows. You wake up in my bed at least three times a week. A little teasing, then we’ll watch the movie, and fuck in private.” She raised herself up a little, and pulled her shirt up, revealing her bare chest at eye level.

He licked his bottom lip. She cupped her breasts, using her thumbs to tease. She pinched her nipples with her fingertips and pulled them, rolled them. The lust grew in his eyes. He growled and pushed her hands away and covered one with his mouth.

She dropped down and his cock twitched against her. She rubbed against him and he rewarded her with another jerk.

He caught her nipple with his teeth, scraping, then digging into her. She pressed her lips together, but a whimper escaped. He let go and smiled up at her. “Slut,” he whispered.

She pressed her thighs harder against him. “Say it again.”

“My slut.” He grabbed the back of her head and kissed her hard. She opened her mouth and met his tongue.

“I want to suck you off.”

“She’s coming back.”

“I’ll be really fast.” She used the flat of her hand to rub over his erection. The previous day Ava and Cassie were talking about Justin’s reluctance to touch Ava in his wife’s presence. Cassie really wanted to watch them have sex. Ava understood she’d love to see Justin and Cassie fucking.

They decided that the best course of action was to be caught. While they hadn’t decided on when, Ava decided there was no time like the present.

He groaned. He lifted his hips and pushed his pants down. She unhooked her legs from him and he tugged his pants and underwear off his feet.

She pushed the coffee table further away and slid to the floor. She wedged herself between his thighs and stroked his cock with her hand. “Have you ever thought of Cassie and I both going down on you?”

It was Ava’s favorite fantasy of late. But Cassie wasn’t so sure. Her sex drive was still stuck in low and she wasn’t sure if she was interested in participating with Justin and Ava.

“That first night in the basement, when you saw me jerk off.”

“Yeah.” She remembered that. She leaned forward and swirled her tongue around the head of his cock.

“That’s what I was fantasizing about.”

Oh yes. She took him deep into her mouth. He groaned, his hand massaging her scalp. “That’s my girl.”

She swirled her tongue around him, massaging with her mouth as she moved on and off his dick.

He grabbed her hair and stopped her from moving. He thrust into her mouth. She heard a noise behind her. He paused for a moment, his thighs tense against her shoulders. Cassie. He started thrusting into her again, slower, more deliberate.

She strained her eyes looking up at him. He looked down at her and tightened his grip, moving faster. She focused on breathing deeply while he fucked her mouth, her hands gripped his thighs, stroking up and down with her nails.

His legs shuddered first, then his entire body as he spurted into the back of her mouth. He let go and she scrambled back to keep from choking as she swallowed and wiped her face.

She sat on the floor and turned her head. Cassie sat on the chair adjacent to the sofa she and Justin occupied. She had the popcorn bowl on her lap as the scene unfolded before her.

“Was it as hot as you imagined?” Ava grabbed a handful of popcorn from the bowl.

“About as much,” Cassie said.

“Did you plan this?” Justin put a throw pillow over his lap.

“We talked about it happening, the opportunity kind of presented itself.”

“So would that be the end?” Cassie asked. “Did Ava already come?”

“No. Usually he’d use a toy on me or eat me out until he was hard enough to fuck me.”

“I want to see it.”

“What?” Justin’s eyes bounced between his wife and her sister, his lover.

“I want to see you two fuck. Maybe bend her over the edge of the sofa down on the far end. I can see your faces,” Cassie instructed.

“I get to watch you two sometime right?” Ava waved her hands at them.

“Sure, it seems fair,” Cassie said. “Now, make Ava come with your tongue.”

Ava pushed her pajama pants down her hips. She kicked them off her feet and stroked between her legs with her fingers.

“I can still remember the first time you went down on me,” Cassie said.

“That good?” Justin smiled at his wife.

“Bad. So bad. But I got off eventually.”

“It was my first time doing it. Plus, I was so afraid one of my parents was going to come home.”

Ava didn’t want to say anything. She let her eyes bounced between them as they talked. She was glad she had experienced Justin, letting Cassie train him was to her benefit.

“Your skills have improved since babe.”

“I hope so.”

“I can vouch for his skills,” Ava said.

Justin pushed her hand aside and stroked his finger over her clit, a soft tease. She closed her eyes with a sigh.

There was no sound but the three of them breathing. Justin’s fingers pressed harder, making Ava’s breath faster. He slipped down onto the floor and pressed her thighs apart.

“Are you totally shaved?” Cassie asked. “Is she?” Ava’s eyes flew open. Seriously? Right now?

Ava groaned as Justin moved back, his hand stilling on her. “Yes,” she said through clenched teeth. “I have been for a couple years.”

“Is that better?”

“Just different,” Justin said. “Anymore questions?” His eyes were amused as he looked at up Ava.

“Is she wet?”

Very wet, soaking. Do you want to feel?” He held out his hand.

Cassie jumped off her chair and touched his fingers. “That’s pretty wet.” She sniffed her fingers and shrugged.

She moved back to her chair. Justin’s breath was hot on Ava’s cunt, then his mouth was there. She squeezed her eyes shut, unable to look at Cassie while he ate her out.

His tongue flicked against her clit and she shuddered. He sucked it into his mouth. She slipped her hands under her shirt and pinched her nipples. “Oh fuck, yes. Harder.”

He obliged her by scraping his teeth against the throbbing nub. She gasped. Fuck, not what she meant, but the bastard bit down on her; hard enough to make her swear. “Fuck, fuck.”

“What?” Cassie asked.

“He fucking bit me.” His tongue soothed the inflamed spot and her arousal took a huge jump. Oh she was so close. He pulled away and she dropped her head against the back of the sofa.

“So fucking close.” She glared down at him.

“I know.” He smirked at her and her heart did a stupid flip in her chest. “I don’t want you to come until I’m inside you.”

She pressed her lips together to keep from cursing him. Shouldn’t she get more orgasms? Who cared? Quality over quantity, she decided, and Justin brought the quality.

She stepped over him and stripped off her her shirt. She leaned against the arm of the sofa where Cassie requested they fuck. She didn’t see him grab a condom, or cover himself.

“Are there any rooms you don’t have condoms in?” Cassie asked.

“Kids room. Kitchen,” Justin said.

She shook her head.

He shrugged as he covered his erection. “Your sister is a slut. Kind of like you were at her age.”

“I was younger when I was a slut.”

Justin moved to stand behind Ava. “So was your sister. Hasn’t she told you the stories?”

“Yes. She’s got a far higher drive than I ever had.”

“I wanted to be like my big sister.” Ava said.

He stroked between her legs. He grabbed her hair and pushed her down further, her ass higher. He guided his cock into her dripping cunt and buried himself deep in her.

Ava squirmed a little under Cassie’s gaze. “I think being watched made him harder. Or bigger. I feel more filled.”

He pulled out slowly and slammed into her. She grunted and dropped her head. Searing pain turned through her as he still held her hair tight. Her head snapped back up and he slammed into her again. And again.

He let go of her head and snaked his hand around her body and pressed into her clit. His fingers dragged over her clit, pulling the arousal tighter in her belly. Within four thrusts, she was back to the edge of pleasure. She arched her back and met his thrusts, his body slapping into her with a brisk rhythm. “Fuck yes,” she grunted. “Fuck me.”

He pinched her clit. Her inner walls clenched around him, flooding, and he slammed into her again, and the waves of orgasm overcame her, drowning her in pleasure. She shook while he continued to fuck her, her body went limp over the edge of the sofa as she tried to slow her breath. That orgasm, with Cassie watching her, drained her of all energy.

She barely started to feel a second building when his thighs shook against hers. He thrust deeper and held deep inside, his body trembling behind her.

His weight leaned against hers, trapping her on the sofa as he panted.

“You were right, that was way hotter than I’d ever imagined,” Cassie said.

“I can’t wait to see you,” Ava replied. “Are aroused at all?”

Cassie shrugged. “As much as I enjoyed it, not really.”

Aw, I was hoping that you’d want him to go down on you next. That would be awesome.”

Justin recovered, his breathing slowed and he lifted himself off her. “I don’t think I could get hard again tonight.”

“You don’t need to get hard. Eat her out. Make her come.” Ava turned to him and put her hands on his chest.

“I could do that.”

Cassie waved her hands. “No thank you. This is why we are here. So you two can fuck and I can know you’re both happy.”

Ava picked her shirt up and took a seat on the sofa. “Cass. Can I confess something?”

“You love Justin?”

Ava nodded. Justin sat beside her and took her hand. Cassie’s weight moved the sofa on the other side. “I didn’t mean to.”

“You’ve loved him forever, honey. I’ve always known that. He loves you too.”

“Well,” Justin said.

“Babe, come on. You wouldn’t sleep with someone you didn’t have feelings for. You wouldn’t have let her move in with us, another mouth for you to feed, without loving her. It’s okay. I love that you love each other. It doesn’t take away anything from what I have with either of you. It makes me happier.”

Relief flooded Ava’s body. “Oh thank fuck. I’ve been freaking out for a few days about it. How I was going to tell  you, or make it go away.”

Cassie put an arm around her sister and pulled her close. “There was nothing to tell. I didn’t know how much I wanted this until it happened.”

“You’re the best sister,” Ava said, hugged her sister. “I love you.” She leaned the other way and kissed Justin’s cheek. “I love you too.”

He kissed her forehead. “I love you too, Ava.” He leaned behind her and kissed Cassie. “And I love you.”

“And I love you both. Now put some clothes on because I’m still a little insecure about my body shape.”

“You’re gorgeous,” Justin said.

“You are,” Ava agreed.

“Get dressed.” Ava slipped out from under them and dressed while they cuddled closer and kissed again.

Ava put her clothing on. She sat on the far side of Justin when she came back. They all snuggled in and someone managed to hit play on the remote for the movie. She realized that she was kind of settled down, in a way she never expected, or wanted. There was nowhere else she could be this happy.

If you haven’t ready Good Sisters Share, you can pick up your copy at any electronic retailers.


Good Sisters Share: a polyamorous love story.

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