I listen to a lot of business podcasts. I don’t know why but I’m drawn to small business advice and internet marketing. One of my favorite podcasts is The Fizzle Show. They recently had an amazing episode where they interviewed Ross Symons, who makes his living from origami which he started as a 365 day challenge on his Instagram.
Ross embodies focus but non-attachment to the outcome. He says in the interview when he started the 365 day origami challenge he focused on what he would fold next. And he extrapolated that his creative life as his origami took off into an actual business. If he gets stressed about money or the next gig or follower count, he refocuses on what he can control: the next thing he’ll fold and share.
Creativity in the modern world can be distilled down to two essences: create and share. As a creative you should be either creating or sharing. What’s next? Create something, then share it, after you share, create something new.
I had a bit of a meltdown about two things. One, mistaking attention for respect and using me for as textual masturbatory device, I get a lot of text equivalents of dick pics. Some people are very overt, and some are far more subtle and sneak past my defenses. I have terrible boundary setting skills; I don’t talk about it much, but I have some childhood trauma stuff and boundaries were not something I learned. I realized after the fact that my gut was telling me all this in the first place, but I ignored my body’s warning.
The second thing is anxiety about my writing future. I worry about my mailing list numbers, my follower count, my sales numbers, I flip flop on buying ads. I want to make enough money so I don’t need a job, but when I read blog posts and listen to podcasts about selling more books it all seems like gimmicks, ads. And I don’t want to market or do gimmicks or ads, so maybe I have to resign myself to needing a job while I write.
I thought about quitting. But a friend said I have to write for myself.
As I was writing this, someone in a fan fiction community *cough*DragonAge*cough* posted complaining about high reads and low likes and comments. And I said if you are writing for likes and comments, then you are likely to be unhappy. When is it enough reviews? Or comments? Or likes? Or shares? We will always want more.
If you write what you want to read, you’ll be happy. I may never become a full time author. But I will always create stories that I love.
So I’m going to keep writing. I’m going to focus on what I can control: creating and sharing.
In an ideal world, a blog post once a week, an IG poem 3-7 days a week, and keep making up stories and publish as they are done. I’ll give them away to my email list. And I’ll continue my search for a job. I wrote better, easier, less anxiety when I was working. (I’ve been a stay at home mom for 7 years, I’m currently a substitute educational assistant and if you all cross your fingers, I’ll return to that full time this fall).
Kylie could barely sit on the chair while she at the meal Brad cooked for her. She looked at the table top where just ten minutes ago she was pressed against the cool surface, while he teased her, then filled her ass with a butt plug. He’d been talking about owning her ass, he’d fingered her there a few times.
Every time she shifted, the plug shifted, plus her thighs were sticky from the teasing. She had almost lost her appetite for food. She picked at the meal while she normally loved what he cooked.
“What’s wrong? Not hungry?” He grinned from behind his fork. “Eat up like a good girl and you’ll get a reward.”
She cut a piece of chicken off the breast and ate it. “Can we eat after we fuck?”
He shook his head. “This is part of you learning patience.”
She nodded. He was training her to be a good submissive. And she was trying, but sometimes, like before he teased her, she slipped into what he called “brat Kylie.” She was sassy, always had been, but with him it seemed more natural.
After they ate, he left without a word. She started clearing the dishes, dying to know if he was getting the bedroom ready to fuck her. He came back holding something, it looked like a chain. Maybe it was a collar and leash? She didn’t know. She kept at her job while watching him out of the corner of her eye. The chain disappeared into his pocket.
“See, I knew you were a good girl.” He pulled her from her job and against his body. He kissed her, his tongue spicy in her mouth. His hands slid inside her shirt each caressing a breast, teasing her nipple with a soft touch. He rolled her t-shirt up from the bottom, to bare her breasts. She thought he might use his mouth on her but he pulled the chain out.
“What is that?” She tried to get a better look.
“Tell me if I set these too tight. I didn’t close them all the way.” He slipped a clamp onto her nipple and she gasped. “Too tight?”
The pain eased into a dull ache. “I don’t know.”
The other one caused a gasp but settled into an arousing ache. She rubbed the spot above where it was latched to her. “It hurts but in a good way.” Now they could get to the fucking.
“Good. We should get these dishes cleared up before we watch the movie.”
Her jaw dropped open. “Movie?” He was going to leave her like this for an entire movie.
He grinned and she scowled. Bastard was fucking with her again. “We’ll see how it goes.”
By the time dishes were done, her pussy was throbbing. Between the plug and the nipple clamps, she was dying to get off. She might even beg him.
“If you crawl do you think your body will push the plug out?” he asked.
“Try. squeeze it in.” She dropped to her hands and knees and followed him to the living room. She knelt on the floor by his chair. His hand came to her hair and massaged her scalp. “You are so fucking beautiful. Are you wet?”
“Soaked,” she replied, easily. Quickly. She used to be shy discussing sex with him, but her arousal erased any apprehensionshe might have had.
“Show me.” She pressed hand between her legs and gathered moisture on her first two fingers. He removed his pants and boxers and sat on the chair, his cock at half-hard.
She offered her fingers and he sucked them into his mouth.
“You are wet. Seems I’m not as ready as you. I have been thinking about fucking your ass since the package came Wednesday. Are you ready for that?”
“If you think I’m ready.”
“I think you’ll let me know if anything feels bad or painful. Seems you like having your ass filled.”
“I do. Sir.” He didn’t demand the title, but it seemed appropriate for the moment.
“How about you suck my cock and get me hard?” It sounded like a question, but it was more like a command.
She took his cock in hand and wrapped her mouth around it, pushing him deep in her mouth. He wrapped her hair around his hand, controlling her head, sliding her mouth up and down his length. Then he pulled her off with a pop.
She smiled up at him then dropped her eyes. Moment of truth was upon her. He put his hand under her chin and pulled her up. “Do you want this little miss?”
“Yes. I’m nervous though.”
“Come sit on my lap, little girl.” She crawled up on his lap, which was a little uncomfortable. “Give me a kiss.”
She pressed her lips to his. He deepened the kiss and twiddled her nipple with one hand, his other pressed her thighs apart, fingers slipping across her inner lips, flicking her clit. He moved further back and wiggled the plug in her ass. She moaned against his lips.
“Good girl.” He picked her up and carried her to the bedroom.
He laid her on the bed. “On your hands and knees my little slut.”
She turned onto her hands and knees. He eased the plug from her body. She watched him over her shoulder while he covered his dick with lube. He plunged two fingers into her pussy, finger fucking her until she relaxed.
He held the base of his cock while he pressed against her ass. “Just like before little miss, relax, tell me if it hurts.”
She nodded. “I’m ready, sir. Fuck my ass.”
He smacked her ass with his free hand then slowly pressed into her. She squeezed her eyes shut and took a few deep breaths until he stopped moving. She was full of him. “How does that feel little miss?”
“You feel tight, like you’re hugging my cock, begging me fuck you.”
“I want you to.”
“You want me to fuck you?”
She swallowed. His twisted one nipple clamp untils he she squealed. Her cunt clenched and she pushed him deeper inside. “Please fuck me. Hard.”
He twisted harder. “Come on slut. You can do better than that.”
She gasped. She spoke louder, “Please fuck me, sir. Pound my fucking ass.”
“That’s my girl.” He slid his hand down to her pussy and rubbed her clit, while he thrust slowly into her.
Pleasure blossomed in a place deep inside she didn’t know existed. She pressed her ass up in the air. The pleasure turned to straight need. She needed to come. She needed him to fuck her.
“I need you to fuck me hard. Please.” She hoped that she conveyed the absolute need for him to take her.
He grabbed her hips with both hands and pounded into her her. He grunted and groaned behind her while he took her. She used two fingers against her clit while she met his thrusts with equal force.
“Oh god yes, I’m going to come,” she ground out.
He slowed. “Who owns your ass?”
“You do, Sir. Please I’m so close to coming. Don’t stop.” She whimpered.
“Say it again.”
“You own my ass. And my pussy. And my mouth.”
He rewarded her answer with a renewed fucking. And there it was, the pleasure exploded inside of her, like an earthquake. It resulted in a tsunami of sensation, overwhelming her. Her limbs shook. He caught her before she crashed so he could finish inside her. His orgasm didn’t even register, but he must have had one because he eased her onto the bed. She couldn’t stop shaking.
He hovered over her. He spoke, but she couldn’t hear it over the roar in her ears. She forced her arm up and patted him. He pulled her onto his lap. “Ky, hey baby. You okay?”
“I’ve never come like that ever. The first couple times I was with you it was pretty intense, but those times were nothing compared to this.”
“So it was good?”
“It was very good. Fuck. I can’t fucking move.”
He moved her to the pillows. “I will get you a glass of juice. Do you want something to eat?”
She shook her head. Once he disappeared she dropped onto the pillow. Fuck. She came back into her body and checked to see how she felt. Sore? No, stretched, gaping. But not sore.
He came back and cuddled with her until she felt like she could move again. “It will hurt when I take these off,” he warned, toying with the clamps still holding her nipples.
She wasn’t. She squealed when he removed them. He soothed them with his fingers then his tongue. He pulled her close and stroked her, watching for signs of drop. They were both ready for sub drop now, the first few times it hit her hard. Now she was aware, but tonight she was good. Tonight, like every night, he held her and kept her safe. What more could she want?
Brad returned from the bed room with his new toy in his pocket. He checked on the chicken first, adjusting the temperature so he had a few extra minutes.
He turned and grabbed his girlfriend around the waist. He kissed her neck, his hand slid over her hip, across her stomach and inside her shirt. He teased her nipple until she melted against him. Then he gripped it between his thumb and finger and pinched until she whimpered.
“How’s my good girl?”
He gripped her ponytail and pulled her back. “I have something for you.”
“If it’s your dick, that’s not anything new.”
He pulled her hair harder. “Smartass.” He walked her forward. “Hands on the table and bend over.”
She complied, like the good girl. “I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what?”
“Being a brat.” She couldn’t seem to help herself. He might have to step up the punishment.
“We must have a night where you can be as bratty as you want. Tonight, there’s punishment for it.” He pulled up her skirt, exposing her bare ass to the kitchen. With no pretense or warm-up he slapped her five times. Her skin was red, but it wouldn’t last long. He caressed the soft spot.
She stood up. He pushed her down. “Stay there.” He used his knee to nudge her legs apart. He could see evidence of her arousal already. “You’re wet already, my little slut.”
She sighed. “I can’t help it. You smack me and my body knows what’s coming next.”
He slid his finger along her slit. “Perhaps I should just leave you there without touching you.”
“I won’t, but not because you asked. But because it’s my plan to turn you on.”
He slipped a finger inside her, wetting his skin. He used the damp on her clit, flicking across the sensitive nub until she moaned.
“Stay there, I’ll show you the new toy that arrived. One of them. I spent some money, but we’ll unveil the new toys slowly.”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out the plug. He set it on the table within her view. “Is that for my ass?” she asked. He didn’t know if he’d fucked her enough times or it was her arousal that erased her usual shyness. It had slowly been dropping, but the blunt question was unusual.
“It is.” He picked it up and pressed it against her pussy. He used it to rub her clit. He thrust the plug inside her. He dropped his hands away. “I forgot the lube, hold that until I get back.”
He went quickly to the bedroom, but when he got back, he found her wiggling it inside of her.
He coughed and she dropped her hands away. “You’re a bad girl tonight, little miss.”
“I haven’t seen you all week.” He had his teenage daughter’s for the week while their mother was out of town and explaining why their former babysitter was sleeping over with Daddy was out of the question.
“Poor little slut.” He pulled the plug from her pussy and coated it with lube. He pressed it against her ass, wiggling it. She tensed and he pulled away. “You will push down a little while I put it in. If it hurts tell me.”
He watched the spot relax and he moved slowly until he was all the way in. He rubbed her lower back. “How does it feel?”
She wiggled her hips. “Okay. Strange.”
He curled two fingers against her clit. “Better?”
She thrust back against him. “Much.”
He removed his hand and smoothed her skirt down. “Stand up.”
She stood stiffly. Her hand rubbed over her ass cheek. “That’s it.”
He kissed her cheek as the timer went off for the potatoes. “That’s it until after we eat.”
He held her hand and brushed his lips over her knuckles. He turned her hand over and kissed his way up her forearm. His head came level with hers, their eyes met. “Can I kiss you?”
He always asked. It took time to get used to that. Ten dates now. She might be in love. She was definitely in lust.
His lips brushed over hers. Then his mouth pressed down, pulled her open to him. His tongue, the same as always, sweet. But this kiss was different. He moved a little slower, lingered a little.
His fingers rubbed the material of her shirt between them. He pulled from the kiss. “I’m going to kiss your neck.” How did he say it so naturally, sexy and sweet?
She tipped her head and his mouth came down on her neck. He skated over her skin, with a nip and a suck.
“Tell me if there is anything you don’t like.”
“I need to hear you say yes.”
“Yes. I like kissing you.”
“You arouse me. Do I arouse you?”
She bit her bottom lip and looked down. Her face heated. She had never been asked so boldly. “Yes.”
He kissed her again. His tongue stroked hers until she felt dizzy.
“Can I touch your breasts?”
She nodded. His eyebrow raised. “Yes. Please.”
Part of her wanted him to hurry, part of her wanted to see how far he’d take the questions of consent.
They kissed again, this time he caressed her breast over her clothes. He kneaded one then the other.
“Do you want to take your shirt off?”
She bit her bottom lip. “Do you want to see my skin?”
“Yes.” He ran the back of his hand over her throat. “Your soft, sweet skin. I want to run my hands over it. Then see if you taste better than you smell.”
She grabbed the arm of her sweater and pulled her arm loose. The second arm came free and he pulled it over her head.
“I want you to touch me.”
“Tell me where.” He nuzzled her neck. “Tell me how.”
She took a deep breath of him. Power filled her head and made her dizzy. She was fully in control.
“My-my shoulders. Like a massage.” His fingers were there, pressing into her muscle. She rolled her neck.
She took a few deep breaths while she got the courage to keep directing him. “Run your hands over my stomach while you kiss my shoulders”
His hands moved back and forth over her abdomen while his mouth kissed over from one shoulder, the hollow of her throat to the other shoulder.
She twisted her arms behind her back and unsnapped her bra. He slid the straps down her arms and let it drop off her fingers.
He looked over her breasts and she’d never felt so naked. She squeezed her eyes closed, her face hot.
His finger touched under her chin. “Look at me. How do I look?”
Her eyes fluttered open and she focused on him. His eyes were darker than she’d ever seen, deeper. His mouth was open. He looked like he wanted her.
“You look hot. Ready. Turned on.”
“I am all those things. I want to make you feel the same way. I want to know you like my touch. Every step, I want you there with me.”
“I am.” Her voice was barely a breath.
“Can I touch your breasts? Tease your nipples? Kiss them?”
They tightened with anticipation. “Yes, you can.”
He pressed her body against hers. “Thank you.”
His hand cupped her breast, his thumb brushed over her nipple. “Do you like it soft or harder?”
She pressed her lower body against his. She rubbed her legs together. “A bit of firmness.”
He rolled one between his thumb and finger. “Like that,” he said. “You gasp a little when I do it. Now for my taste of your skin.” He kissed from her collar bone to her nipples. He sucked it into his mouth and swirled his tongue around her.
Who needed spontaneity? It was hotter when he asked for consent. It was hotter knowing ahead of time.
He pulled the heat of his mouth away and blew on the hardened tip. It tightened a little more.
He licked her other nipple. His tongue made slow, big circles around the tip.
“Take off your shirt,” she panted. “I need- I want- can I touch you?”
His eyes were hot on her as he stepped back and did as she requested. “I’d love your hands on me. A little firmness in my stomach please. Too light and it will tickle.”
She hissed in a breath as she looked over his muscled body. Did he feel as naked as she did when his eyes roamed her?
His body pulled her hand. She recalled his instructions for a firm touch. She traced the lines of his muscles. She traced a circle around one of his nipples. “Does that feel good? Like when you touch mine?”
“If an orgasm is ten and hand holding is one. Where does nipple touching fall for you?”
She rubbed her thumb against the soft nub. “A touch like this four.” She bent her head and sucked him into her mouth, flicking her tongue against him. “That’s a five. On the right day a harder pinch is a six or seven.”
“That good, huh? The first touch is a three and the lick-suck parts are four maybe five.”
“What’s kissing for you?”
“Kissing you is a solid eight.”
She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him. He stayed still. She bit his bottom lip. “Can I kiss you?”
His lips twitched. “Yes.”
“I want your hands all over me.” She breathed out the confession before pressing herself against him. She tipped her head to deepen the kiss. Tongues, teeth.
He ran his fingers from her neck to her hips.
She unbuttoned her jeans and pushed them down. She broke the kiss to remove them.
“Can I take you to bed?” He rested his hands on her waist, his fingers moving restlessly on her skin, almost a tickle.
“Please. Yes please,”
He took her hand and pulled her to the bedroom. She sat on the bed and looked up at him. He brushed his hands across her cheek. “Do you want to lay down?”
She scooted across the blankets and stretched out on the pillows. He removed his jeans and then stretched beside her.
“Kiss me,” she whispered. “Touch me, everywhere. Make me come. I want you inside me, I want you filling me.”
He kissed her, his tongue filling her mouth. She hoped that her words answered his questions of consent. His hands caressed from her shoulder to her knees. He parted her knees, then slid his fingers up her inner thigh. When he brushed over her panties where the covered her, she shivered. He pulled away from the kiss. She slapped her hand on top of his. “Keep going, please. A little harder.”
“I’m getting harder,” he quipped.
She moved her hand to the front of his underwear. “Yes,” he whispered against her lips. He pressed up into her hand.
“Skin,” he hissed. “I need to feel skin.”
”Me too,” she moaned against his mouth. She shoved her underwear down and kicked it off her feet. He squeezed her eyes shut as he did the same. They were naked. Her heart was already pounding when she opened her eyes. It came out of her chest when his hand ran from her hip to her knee then back up her inner thigh.
She spread her legs to encourage him. He bent over her. “How do you like to be touched?”
Was she supposed to know? “I’m not sure. I never thought about it.”
“Direct me then. Tell me harder or softer. Right or left.”
He brushed his fingertip over her clit.
“Harder. A little more pressure. A little left. Perfect. Should I touch you as well?”
“Enjoy this for now. Do you prefer this or if I put my fingers inside you?”
A shiver ran down her spine. “This. Maybe move in a circle.” he followed her direction. “Vary the pressure a little.”
“Can you come like this?”
“Probably.” She bit her bottom lip. His mouth would help.
He bent his head and whispered. “Tell me what you want.”
“Your mouth, your tongue on my clit.”
He smiled and perched between her legs. “Ask and you shall receive.” His tongue slide over her slit, splitting her. He flicked his tongue against her clit.
She arched her back. “Yes. Like that.” Her moans climbed higher as he used her words against her sensitive parts. She gripped his hair as her nerves exploded with pleasure. He tried to pull back, but she held him there for a moment, and he got the message and continued licking her through the climax.
She let him go and he sat back. A smile on his face while he wiped his chin with the back of his hand.
“Sorry, I was too busy screaming to give instructions. I needed a little more.”
“That’s okay. I got the message. Can I kiss you?”
“You better. What do you want now?”
“Let me show you how to touch me.” He took her hand and wrapped it around his cock and stroked himself. He showed her how to use her thumb over the head, which made him gasp. He took her other hand and moved it over her ball sac. He let go of her hands and let her stroke him. She watched his face as she varried the pressure and speed she used.
“Do you want a blow job?” she asked.
“I might come and I was thinking I wanted to be inside you when I did that. What do you think?”
No problem there. She wanted to give as good as she got right now. She wanted him to feel as good as he made her feel. “I want to be as giving as you are. I’m ready for the sex.”
“You are, I promise. It’s all sex though.” he winked at her. “Tell me what you want.”
“For you to fuck me. To come inside me. Well, with a condom.”
“Of course.” He leaned over and opened his drawer. He pulled out a box and set it on her chest. “Brand new box.”
She opened the security seal and pulled out one wrapper. She set the box on the table next to her. “You or me?”
“Let’s see your skills.”
She covered him quickly. He kissed her again, deep, hot as he rolled over her body. “Like this?” he asked.
“I love everything about tonight,” she said.
He pushed inside her, slowly. She ran her nails lightly down his back. “Me too.” He kissed again and moved inside of her.
She moved with him, meeting his thrusts. Faster, deeper. He grabbed her ass and pulled her tighter to him. Their moans mingled in their kiss.
The faster his thrusts, the harder his fingers grip her. Almost painful, driving her closer to coming. He grunted and shuddered. She held onto him as he came. Her pussy throbbed around him.
“Shit,” he said. “Hold on.”
“You didn’t come again. Are you still aroused?”
“Stay there.” His cock slipped out of her and he left the bed to toss the condom. He laid down beside her. “Do you want me to make you come once more?”
She looked at him, her pussy throbbing. “Yes.”
He thrust two fingers inside her and curled them against her inner walls. He brushed his thumb over her clit. She rocked her hips while he finger fucked her. She grabbed the sheets as the pleasure overtook her.
He kept moving against her, inside her while she shuddered. She lay still and he let his fingers slip from her. He pulled her against him. “Good?”
“Very good. That was unlike anything I’ve ever experienced.”
“Good.” he kissed her and pulled the blankets up over them “Very good.”
I’ve seen people bring up consent and someone will say “so I’m supposed to ask every time. that will ruin the mood. That takes away the spontaneity.” I think it’s more “I’m afraid my partner will say no.” But that’s a hidden script.
So this was my answer.
If you practice requesting consent, asking gets lets scary, less intrusive, more sexy.
This is an ongoing series of a couple. You can read their previous stories here and here. Not entirely necessary but it explains their dynamic and characters, because these are getting long enough without adding in character description. This one is a fun roleplay they do, since Kylie used to babysit Brad’s children (now teenagers).
Brad’s lips brushed against Kylie’s ears. “What if you were babysitting and you came across my porn collection? Would you watch it and touch yourself?”
She bit her bottom lip. “Maybe.”
“What if I came in and found you touching yourself?”
“You’d punish me?”
“I might take you over my knee and spank you. You want to play it out? Pretend you’re a teenager again, babysitting my kids for me.”
She nodded. She used to touch herself while thinking about him when she was too young. Now she’d been had by him so many times, but every time they were together there was something new.
He left her on the sofa and went to the TV. The sounds of a DVD being put in filled the silence. He turned on the TV and fast forwarded past the credits. Soon a man and a woman in a flimsy situation were on the screen. He exited to the kitchen.
Her eyes darted between the TV and the doorway. But when the woman’s pussy was on the screen, Kylie felt electricity between her legs. She lifted her skirt and pressed her hand there to soothe the ache. Her hand got bolder as the couple progressed to fucking.
She moved her panties aside and dipped her finger into her wet cunt. She smeared the juice over her clit. And then Brad’s shadow was over her, his body obstructing her view of the TV.
“What is going on? You’re watching my porn?”
She pulled her hand out from between her legs and sat up straight. “Um. Sorry?”
“Not as sorry as you will be.” He dug his hand into her hair and pulled until she was looking up at him. Redness crept into her face as if she was being chastised.
“I got bored while the kids were asleep. It’s not like they heard anything. Then I find out you watch it while they are sleeping too.”
“That’s none of your business.” He yanked her hair harder.
He let go of her and sat on the sofa. He gripped her arm, not hard enough to hurt. If she struggled it would and he would tighten his grip. She looked at him with wide eyes. “What are you going to do, Mr. Nash?”
“I should take you home and tell your parents what a dirty slut you are.”
“Please don’t tell them.” She fluttered her eyelashes. “Please?”
“Should I punish you myself?”
“Spank you. Naughty girls get spanked, right?”
“I-I guess. If I let you spank me, you won’t tell my parents?”
“All right. How?”
“Across my lap. Hands on the floor.”
She laid across his lap and balanced herself. He slapped her ass. She counted in her head while he did it. The porn still playing on the TV. His erection pressed against her and she knew she was sopping. And damn her ass stung in the sweetest way. Shehad no idea she would enjoy pain so damn much. Shehad no idea a lot of things until Brad showed her.
She pressed her legs together. He stopped slapping her ass. His hand pressed between her thighs. “Mr. Nash?”
“You are a dirty slut,” he murmured. “Look how wet you are from getting spanked.” His fingers against her panties ground into her pussy.
“You like that?”
“Sit up.” She got to her feet, rubbing her ass. Fuck.
He pulled her down beside him. “We’ll watch porn together. You like watching porn?”
“Have you had sex before?”
She stared at the TV. And the woman riding the man and imagined it was her on top of Brad. Her tits bouncing. His mouth on her. Could they get to that part?
He covered her breast and massaged it. Then he squeezed until she whimpered. “Have you had sex? Or are you a virgin?”
“I’m not.” He released his hold on her breast and teased her nipple.
“How old were you when you first had sex?” His voice was a little firmer. This was Brad her boyfriend asking, not the roleplay.
“Fifteen. To my boyfriend. It was bad. Really bad. But we kept at it for a year and it was okay by the end. Then I upgraded.” She winked at him.
He nodded. Then he shook his head. “Do you like sex Kylie?”
“Yes, Sir.” She bowed her head.
“Would you have fucked me Kylie?” Out of the roleplay again.
“I don’t know.” Would she have? She didn’t know. It wouldn’t have crossed his mind. If he had asked her, she would have been powerless to say no. Just as she was now. She didn’t want to say no to him ever. She wanted everything he offered, she wanted more. She begged him for the pain and the pleasure.
“Take off your shirt. I want to see your breasts. Or I’ll tell your parents.”
She stuck her bottom lip out and unbuttoned her shirt. He preferred she wear a white blouse and skirt with stockings or knee high socks. Tonight she had the socks. Which, she supposed, inspired his roleplay suggestion.
She tossed the shirt aside. She sat back on the sofa and thrust her breasts out. “Bra too, or you’ll get another spanking.”
She made a show of sighing and removed it.
He patted his knee. “Come sit on my knee, my little slut.”
When he called her his, it made her insides flutter. When he called her a slut, it made her slippery. She slipped onto his knee. He cupped her breasts, his thumbs teasing her nipples.
“You have beautiful breasts. Your nipples get nice and hard when I touch them. Tells me you like my hands. Does it make you feel good?”
“I want you to feel good Kylie.” His mouth came down on her neck, his fingers tweaked her nipples, pinching, pulling.
She squirmed in his lap, his cock twitched under her ass. “Stop rubbing your legs together,” his voice was gruff.
“Do you know why?”
She shook her head, playing the role of almost innocent girl. “No.”
“Your body wants me to touch you. It’s asking for me to get you off.”
She rubbed her legs together. Yes, she need his hands on her. His fingers pressing into her. His cock inside her, pounding her.
“Ask me to touch your cunt.”
“Please, touch my…” She didn’t need to pretend to hesitate here, she was still shy sometimes. “My cunt.”
His fingers stroked her slit through the soaking fabric. “Fuck, you’re soaking.” He pushed the crotch of her panties aside and pressed two fingers into her. She squeezed her eyes shut as they slipped in and out of her. She arched her hips, trying to get more.
He pulled his fingers from her and rubbed them on her lips. “Taste yourself.”
She sucked his fingers into her mouth, using her tongue to lap up every drop. His fingers pulled from her mouth with a pop, and he grabbed the waistband of her panties. She lifted her hips to let him remove them.
He slipped out from under her. He knelt in front of her and pulled her ass until it was on the edge of the cushion. He pressed his mouth against her cunt. She spread her legs and relaxed against the back of the sofa. His tongue slid along her slit, then split her open.
She ran her fingers through his dark hair, silky between her fingers. His tongue flicked against her clit, and she shuddered. She pressed against his face, trying to ride him.
He pulled back and grabbed her hips. “Be still, or I won’t let you come.”
“For how long?”
“As long as I want. I’ll get you right to the edge and then stop.” His eyes narrowed up at her.
She sat back. “I’ll be good.” He did to her one night, three times before he let her come.
“I know you will.”
He pushed her legs apartand used his fingers to open her. She watched as his thumb brushed her clit. Then his tongue and that was it. She pressed her hands into the sofa as she came apart. The orgasm ripped through her without warning. He held her against his mouth as he ate her through the aftershocks.
When she slowed down, he sat up and kissed her. “You taste like heaven,” he whispered against her lips.
“Are you a good girl, Kylie?”
“Yes, sir. I try to be.”
He got up and changed the DVD. “We’ll watch something new while I teach you how to touch me.” He shed his pants while he fast forwarded through the opening scene. “If you want me to believe you’re a good girl, you need to know how to please me. Do you want to show me what a good girl you are?”
He took her hand and pressed it to the bulge in his briefs.
“Slide your hands inside my shorts and stroke my dick.” She did as he instructed. His hand came to her scalp and massaged. “Good girl. That’s my good girl.”
She watched a new couple fucking on the TV. She had missed the premise behind this one. She wasn’t sure it mattered.
“Have you ever had a dick in your mouth?”
“Have you ever sucked cock?”
She shook her head. Fake Kylie didn’t, she hadn’t.
“Time for you to learn. Like a good girl. On your knees right there.” He indicated the spot in front of him. She withdrew her hand and knelt on the floor. He removed his briefs, his dick waved before her face. She reached for it then, recalled she was waiting for his instructions. She rested on her heels to wait for him.
“Wet your lips.” His fingers massaged her scalp again. “Open your mouth, but relax. Take the tip of my cock inside. Swirl your tongue around the head. That’s my girl.”
She followed his soft voice. Slowly, she took him deeper. Her hand cupped his balls, fingers feathering the soft skin. She wrapped her hand around his base while she bobbed her mouth along his ever hardening length.
“I’d love to come in your mouth, watching you swallow. But I have to finish up with you and get you home.” His hands in her hair pulled her off his dick. “I guess we should hope for your sake I can go slow.”
He pulled her around to the edge of the sofa. He pressed her onto the arm rest, her arms flopped onto the seat cushion. He plunged a finger into her cunt again. “Are you still wet or did sucking me off get you wet again?”
“Both,” she groaned.
His thighs bumped the backs of hers as he positioned himself against her. He thrust into her without warning, without further pretense. “Umpf.” She tossed her head against the cushion, her face almost pressed into the back of the sofa.
She squeezed her inner muscles around him. He groaned. “You know more than you show, you little slut.” His voice was close to her ear, then he raised himself and fucked her hard. He gripped her head and pulled her head back, his hand wrapped around her throat lightly as he took her.
She was so close to coming when he grunted against her shoulder, shuddering. He pulled out of her and turned her over. He took his cock in his hand and stroked himself furiously until he spurted on her stomach, up to her chest. “I like seeing you painted in my come.” His shoulders heaved while he came down.
She was still on edge. So close it hurt. “I need to come,” she whimpered.
“Mmm. Have you been a good girl? You already came once.”
“Yes.” She squirmed under him. “Please sir.”
He brushed his finger over her clit. She tried to move her hips to get more friction. She was a little surprised and grateful when he pressed harder, his finger on the spot that made her quiver. She closed her eyes and indulged in the sensation building until it overflowed and she released.
“Good?” he asked.
She opened her eyes a little. “Much better, thank you sir.”
If you have not read The Poker Game, stop and go read it. These are the characters. I’ve been playing with them a bit, seeing if there’s a full story there or not. This one got away on me a little. It’s long. 3000 words long. Also if I screwed up and called her Kaylie, it’s because I couldn’t decide on Kylie or Kaylie.
“Crawl to me,” he said. I dropped to my knees and crawled across the floor to his chair.
“Kneel there.” I eased up on my knees, my feet tucked under my ass.
Brad looked me over. I smoothed my hands over my top and skirt. Did I pass? I dropped my head, so I was looking at my hands folded in my lap.
He caressed my cheek, then guided my head up, so I met his eyes. “Nervous, miss?”
“Yes, uh, Sir?” What was I to call him?
“Since you liked it so much last night, you can call me Mr. Nash.” I sighed with relief that he could read my mind. “It adds a nice layer of naughtiness and submission.”
He got it. He got me. A smile crept onto my face. He held me from ducking my head.
“You look very nice, miss. Exactly what I imagined.”
“Thank you, Mr. Nash.”
“You still need to be spanked for last night’s transgressions.”
I gulped. I bit my lower lip and fiddled with my skirt. I had thought about it a lot today. I tried earlier in my room to spank myself to test it, to see how it felt.
“Never been spanked?”
“As a kid, a couple of times. Never…”
“By a lover.”
I exhaled. Brad Nash, my lover. It felt grown up and illicit. I shook my head. “I tried it on myself earlier today.” My cheeks heated and my eyes darted away.
His thumb stroked my cheek and he smiled. “Did you? How did it feel?”
“It hurt a little. Most it made me tingle.” My hand pressed down between my thighs as they came together.
“Did you touch yourself today?”
“Yes.” Twice but I kept that to myself.
“I would have liked to watch. Another time. Up on my lap now. Feet and hands on the floor.”
He guided me face down over his knees. I closed my eyes as I balanced over him, my ass in the air. My stomach fluttered as he lifted my skirt. He stroked my underwear, red satin. “Very lovely arse.”
“Since you are new, I want to warm you up before I deliver your punishment.”
“I trust you.” The words fell out of my mouth before I could think.
“That is one of the nicest things you could say to me. Before, if it’s too much for you, you must tell me.”
“I thought this was your first time?”
“I’ve read books,” I muttered.
“Ah so you know, red to stop, yellow to slow down, green if you are good. I want to push your limits, not break you.”
“Red to stop, green means go.”
“Do not grit through it. I am trusting you to communicate your limits. It’s not a competition.”
I wanted to get started, so I wasn’t anticipating anything. “I’ll do my best, Sir.”
“Good girl. Are you ready?”
Not really. I didn’t know what his warm up would entail. Safe words I reminded myself.
“Yes, Mr. Nash. I’m ready.”
The first slaps on my ass were so light it was more like patting me on the bottom. But they got harder as time ticked on. He stopped when they were not stinging. “Why am I punishing you, Kylie?”
“For calling you Mr. Nash.”
“For disobeying. Do you like being hurt, Kylie?”
“Not really, sir.”
“Will you disobey me again?”
“No, Mr. Nash.” I wanted to laugh when I said his name because I was being punished for the same thing. I expected if I laughed right then it would add more to my punishment. I wanted him to hit me so we could be done. The idea was turning me on and if he delayed any further, I might rub myself against him.
The first spank made me jump and squeal. I wanted to rub the spot, but I had to keep myself balanced. “Nineteen more,” he said, right before his hand came down on my ass. He counted as he spanked me, I squealed each time.
After ten he rubbed my tender skin. “Safe words, miss?”
I took a moment to realize he was checking in with me. He wanted to punish me, but only if I was okay. His hand slid down between my legs, rubbing my pussy. I closed my legs and rubbed against him. I couldn’t help it.
“Is this turning you on?”
“A little,” I squeaked.
His finger slid under the crotch of my panties and between my pussy lips. “A little? This seems like more than a little, Kylie.”
He pulled his hand away and it was suddenly in front of my face. He rubbed it against my lips. “See how soaked you are?”
“Are you still a little turned on Kylie?”
“I’m very turned on, Mr. Nash.” I wished I could look up at him. I couldn’t charm him from face down on his lap.
“Lick my finger clean, Kylie.” I followed his orders. “So what did you say about liking pain?”
“I said I didn’t like it sir. But no one as sexy as you has ever spanked me. I didn’t know it would turn me on.”
“You didn’t think I would punish you. Now you know. And you know pain turns you on. I will spank you a little harder this time. Say green when you are ready.”
I took a slow shaky breath. “Ready. Green.”
He lied when he said he would spank me a little harder. He spanked me a lot harder. At first it made me squeal, but then I got used to it, or something, and the last three just made me moan.
He rubbed my sore ass. “That’s a good girl,” he crooned. “You can get up when you are ready. But don’t move too fast.”
I lifted my head. “Can you help me onto the floor? I don’t feel steady enough to stand.”
With his help I eased onto the floor at his feet. I leaned on his knees, my breathing calming. “That was lovely.” He dug his hand into my hair and massaged my scalp.
“We have a lot to talk about.”
“I thought this was about getting naked.”
“It can be. If you want. I want more from you.”
I wasn’t used to bluntness like that. More? What more? How much more? I wanted to fuck him and I figured that would be it. I wet my lips and he tugged my head back, so I was looking at him.
“We can take it one day at a time. I won’t cry if you say no, Kylie. There’s an attraction between us and I want to explore it.”
That laid the age difference between us so plainly, so black and white. He wasn’t a boy looking for a play thing.
He tightened his grip on my hair, his other hand cupped my breast. “You respond so beautifully to me. Don’t you want to see what you are capable of?”
He was a man looking for a play thing. I bit my bottom lip. “We’d have to keep it secret. For now. I wouldn’t want Dwight pounding on your door.”
“If you want. You are a grown woman, capable of making her own decisions.” I had never felt like that before. Still in college, still living at home. But he made me want to be that woman.
“I am.” I stretched up on my legs. “I want more too.”
He pulled me forward and kissed me. “Can you submit to me, Kylie?”
I’d read books on submission and Domination. Sexy books. Books that made me long for someone to spank me like Mr. Nash had done, for someone to order me around, for someone to make me want to submit.
“I’ll try. I’ve never…“ I swallowed everything I was afraid to say. I didn’t know how to do this. I’d dated my fair share, I’d had enough sex to know what I liked and didn’t like. This was an entirely different level. I’d never felt less like the grown woman in charge of herself.
“We’ll go slow. Submission is a journey, one day at a time. As long as you remember your safe words and use them when you need them.” His voice was firm, but somehow the commands were gentle.
“Yes, Mr. Nash.”
“Take off your shirt Kylie. I want to see what I won last night.”
“You won?” My hands trembled as I pushed the buttons through their holes.
“You’re kneeling here at my feet. I’d say I won.”
I smiled. “I think we both won.” Heat suffused me as I recalled his mouth on me last night. “Did you lose on purpose last night?”
“Of course not.” The look on his face led me to believe otherwise.
I pulled my arms one at a time from my shirt and let it drop to the floor. I waited for his next command, feeling sexy and exposed at the same time.
“Take off your bra.” This bra. It had taken me ten minutes to decide which color bra to wear whether I should go with a push up or not. I chose the black lacy one, not a push up. I dropped it on the floor with my shirt.
His fingers massaged my scalp. “Good girl.” He leaned back. “Tease your nipples.”
I cupped my breasts and rubbed my thumbs over my nipples, then pinched them gently between my index finger and thumb. “I like seeing a new lover touch themselves. I learn how they like to be touched. Come up on my lap and kiss me, my little miss.”
I was hardly little. My head was spinning. So much, so fast. I got to my feet and sat on his lap. He kissed me, his tongue swirled hers. His hand covered her breast, massaging the flesh. His lips pulled from mine and closed around the nipple. His tongue flicked over the nub which tightened in his mouth.
He pulled away and lavished the attention on the other breast. His hand slid up my leg and brushed against my panties where it stretched over my pussy. I tried to move my hips so I could get a harder touch, but he pulled away.
“You’re being a bad girl now.” He pinched my inner thigh. I winced. I was being a bad girl, he was teasing me and seemed in no hurry to fuck me.
“You’re teasing me.” My mouth formed into a perfect pout.
“And I’ll continue to tease you as long as I want. You already agreed.” He pinched my nipple. “Got it?”
I nodded, looking down out of shame. “Sorry.”
He twisted the nipple and I yelped. “It’s my job to teach you. Tell me about your previous sexual experience.”
What did he want to know? I bit my bottom lip and looked at his legs.
“Look at me Kylie. When was your first sexual experience?” He teased my nipple, light twists, gentle caresses. I forced my eyes upward.
“I had my first kiss and grope stuff around fifteen. The first time I had sex was my boyfriend when I was seventeen. I’ve dated some, had some serious boyfriends. I’ve had sex, but not like this.”
My face heated. He would make me spell it out. “Kinky. Pain and teasing.”
He pinched hard and twisted my nipple. “Like this?”
I nodded, whimpering the only sound I could manage. He rubbed the sore spot, not letting me soothe myself.
“Like betting oral sex at your step-father’s poker table?”
I smiled. “That was a first.”
“What about anal sex? Has anyone fucked your fine ass, little miss Kylie?”
My mouth dropped open. I’d never considered, never been asked. I shook my head.
“So you like oral, you might like spanking and pain. You’re fucking gorgeous on my floor kneeling between my legs. And your panties are soaked.”
My head dropped again. “Yes.”
“Eyes on me, miss. All I thought about since last night is putting my cock in your hot, wet cunt.”
“Me too,” I whispered.
“Is that what you thought about while you touched yourself?”
“Come and sit on my knee again and tell me. See how far you get into the fantasy before I make you come. Take your panties off. I don’t want to see you panties in my house again.”
My eyes were wide as I looked up at him.
“I want access to your cunt whenever you are here.”
I pressed my legs together.
“Get up here before I spank you for disobedience again.”
I scrambled to my feet and shed my panties. He gathered my skirt around my waist and then pulled me onto his lap. “Lean back against me and tell me what you thought about.”
I closed my eyes and leaned back against him. His chest solid against my back. One hand curled around my breast, the other was warm over my pussy.
Talk out loud about what I fantasized about? While his erection pressed against the small of my back, and his hands were all over me.
“Take a deep breath.”
I followed his instructions. “I thought about if I had lost the poker game. Getting on my knees under the table, wrapping my mouth around your cock.” My voice trailed off. What did I think about next?
“Did I come in your mouth?” The flat of his fingers ran up and down my slit.
“Do you swallow come Kylie?”
“I have, I don’t like to. But in my fantasy I wanted to please you.”
“I would like to come in your mouth and have you drink it.” His fingers parted my pussy lips and traced around my clit. “What else?”
“Then you took off my shirt and played with my breasts.”
His fingers on my breast twisted my nipple while his finger brushed over my clit. “Yes, good girl.”
“Then you took off my panties and touched my pussy. Then you pushed me onto the table face down, my ass in the air and you fucked me.”
He slid a finger inside me. I moaned, his thumb pressed against my clit. “How did I fuck you?”
“Hard, fast.” he thrust his fingers faster, his thumb harder. “Like that. You could fuck me. I brought condoms.”
“I’m not done with you yet, Miss. I want you to come like this.”
“That was the end of my fantasy. I was already turned on, so I didn’t much to get me off.”
“Then focus on my fingers.” I rocked my hips in time with his fingers, and he stilled. I fucked his fingers while he teased my clit and wished he was inside me. I came with a whimper and three deep shudders. Then I sank against him.
“Good girl.” He pulled his hands away from me. I turned and saw him licking his fingers off. “Wanted to see if you tasted as good as I recalled.”
I wanted to ask if I did, but I couldn’t get it out.
“You do. But now it’s my turn to feel your mouth and then I’m going to fuck you.” He tweaked my nipples once more. “Up on your feet for a moment.”
I jumped up and stepped back.
“Clasp your hands behind your back,” he instructed. After I did that, and my breasts were on display, he stripped his clothes off. He was in good shape. Great. I wanted to run my tongue along his ab muscles.
“Like what you see?”
He smiled. “Are your knees sore?”
“Good. Back on your knees over here.”
I knelt at his feet again. His fingers massaged my scalp. My eyes bounced from his face to his cock, looking impressive. His free hand curved around his dick and stroked. My pussy clenched.
My hand shook as I reached for him. I squeezed lightly and stroked my hand along the ridges. Imagining it in my mouth, in my pussy made me moan.
His hand on the back of my head encouraged me forward. I opened my mouth and sucked him inside, pushing my tongue along the underside. He guided me deeper until I resisted, then he let go.
I bobbed my head along his length until his thighs tightened against my arms. His hand grabbed her head and pulled her back.
“Too much foreplay.”
His hand grabbed my upper arm and pulled us both to standing. “Should I grab my condoms?”
“I have a pack in the bedroom.” He pulled deeper into his place, into his sanctuary. I had once went into his bedroom when I babysat, it felt forbidden then. And it was similar now. But he was naked and I was almost naked.
He pulled me against him, his mouth coming down on my hard, his tongue hot and fast. He pulled my skirt down, leaving me fully naked in front of him. He eased me back onto the bed. His mouth traveled down my body, searing my breasts, my stomach.
He plunged two fingers into my pussy again. “I don’t know if I’ll last inside something this wet and hot.”
His body heat left me and my chest heaved. He rolled the condom along his length. “This makes me feel as young as you are.”
I smiled. I would ask him later if the age difference bothered him. It didn’t seem too much. His feelings for me were evident as he settled between my thighs. And then he was inside me.
He held my hips, his fingers digging so hard as he pounded me. I felt relieved that he felt the same drive I did. Wanting release, wanting an end to the teasing that had lasted too long for me.
I wanted him to be pleased, to find release. I had come so many times. And it was building again. I squeezed my eyes closed. His grunts in my ear pushed me over the edge. My nails scraped down his arms. He nipped my neck, growling against my vulnerable skin when he came.
As we came down and our skin cooled, I realized that the end of the night meant I had to go home. And I didn’t know when I would see him next. I wrapped my arms around him and pressed myself closer.
He pulled back and looked down at me. I burst into tears. “Sub drop,” he said. He pulled me onto his lap and cradled me in his arms. “I got you.”
I am weary. The weary that comes from a long trip. Too much sitting and waiting.
Some of it shakes off when I exit the plane. He’s out there somewhere, waiting for me. I wonder if I can find a bathroom before I find him. I want to freshen up and change into the new red panties in my bag.
I fail to see a bathroom before familiar eyes find me. I have seen them in my dreams. When I close my eyes they are in my fantasies.
He steps close. Our hellos are soft. He’s so tall. I have to tip my head back to meet his tender gaze.
His hand cupped my jaw, his thumb brushing across my cheek. He moves closer. I pull back. “I’ve been traveling. I’m probably not—”
He cuts me off with his lips against mine.
His lips press mine apart. His tongue sweeping through my mouth. All at once my senses fill with him. It should be overwhelming, but it is perfectly divine. I grip his upper arms to keep from flying away. But instead he flies with me. He’s warm masculine spice, taking me away from the crowd, the weariness, the mundane.
Our tongues spin and dive. And I crash against him. Chest, belly, thighs. I feel the power in him surround me, it presses against me. And I submit to it, to him.
His lips pull away and I feel sticky. Sweat and desire coating me. I can’t let him go, I’m drunk on his lips. Dizzy on his scent. I’ll kneel before him, in front of everyone.
He takes a deep breath, as if inhaling me, then he breaks our embrace. He puts his arm around me while smoothly taking my suitcase and carry on bag.