The holidays are over.
For those of us who have less than ideal families, this means we can all breathe a sigh of relief as we go back to our normal routines, free of our families pass judgement on us.
I had one of those visits over the holiday. Where the person told me everything in my life that I was doing wrong. It left us all raw and grumpy and it was hard to settle the little ones for sleep.
I was getting upset with Sunshine Boy who couldn’t settle for sleep. After he had a good cry and some kicking and screaming, he fell asleep quickly. I thought about having a cry once he went to bed.
Then came the idea.
Instead of dwelling on all the negative comments one has received from one’s critical family member, we should all tell ourselves the things we would like to hear instead. Many want is too weak, NEED to hear.
I love you.
You’re doing a wonderful job.
I’m proud of you.
You’re children are wonderful, spirited, bright..
I’m thinking about creating community for (re)parenting ourselves. I know a lot of women who lack the family support they want. I have had to come to accept that certain people in my life will never be who I want them to be, and I will have to find those traits within myself and from people around me.
I also want commit to speaking to my children, husband, and family and friends in the positive manner above, rather than harping on what is going wrong.
Where you do receive negative feedback in you life? Where do you give negative feedback? Could you take those negative messages and turn them into positive self-talk?